Several Really Short Stupid Poems

4 Nov

Title: Sure, But I’m Not Dancing With Your Uncle That Was Just Released From Prison

plusone

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Title: Stoners Can Be Dicks

Hickory Dickory Dock
The Mouse Smoked All The Pot
The Cheetos Are Gone
Isn’t That Such A Crock?

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Title: Pigs Are Smarter According To Whom

dumbdog

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Title: Your Gym Membership’s First Month Is Free When You Sign Up Today

Some Guys Have A Six Pack
Some Have Four
I Have A Twenty Four Pack
Resting In
The Refrigerator Door

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Title: A Democracy Is Better Than An Omniscient God

paintbynumbers

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Title: Why Is Affordable Health Care So Un-affordable?

I Scratch And I Scribble
This Poem That Is Nothing But Dribble

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Title: Ode To Short Celebrities

Your Elevated Shoes
Do Nothing For Your Douchey Views

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Title: Women Logic

rocket

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50 Responses to “Several Really Short Stupid Poems”

  1. silkpurseproductions November 4, 2013 at 10:31 AM #

    I quite enjoyed these.
    It may be that they were on my level and I understood them.

  2. Blogdramedy November 4, 2013 at 10:44 AM #

    Your words moved me. Really.

  3. Carrie Rubin November 4, 2013 at 11:12 AM #

    Ah, that first one is so romantic. What gal doesn’t want an excuse to shave her pits?…

  4. whiteladyinthehood November 4, 2013 at 11:35 AM #

    The beer one reminded me of watching the motorcycle guys on tv and the young one says, Dad don’t you wish you had a six-pack like me? and Dad says, No, why would I want a six-pack when I have a keg.
    Tada! (Hey, it was funny at the time!)
    You have a nice, but whacky sense of humor, Christopher.

  5. pieterk515 November 4, 2013 at 11:36 AM #

    Ah boredom, the creator of art.

  6. gingerfightback November 4, 2013 at 12:10 PM #

    It is as if Seamus Heaney has been rebirthed in ye! Truly remarkable

  7. Fat Bottom Girl November 4, 2013 at 12:12 PM #

    Got a good chuckle out of these!

  8. jayne November 4, 2013 at 1:06 PM #

    More Women’s Logic please…

    • Christopher De Voss November 4, 2013 at 1:14 PM #

      I don’t know if I quite understand it…

      • jayne November 4, 2013 at 1:14 PM #

        me either but it did make sense

      • Christopher De Voss November 4, 2013 at 1:22 PM #

        I see what you did there

      • jayne November 4, 2013 at 1:37 PM #

        I don’t

  9. floridaborne November 4, 2013 at 2:12 PM #

    Hilarious.

    My son writes and publishes deep-thought poetry that I have no hope of understanding.

    I like the in-your-face poetry that makes me laugh. And as others have mentioned–poetry I can understand. 🙂

    • Christopher De Voss November 4, 2013 at 2:21 PM #

      No deep thoughts here…

      • floridaborne November 4, 2013 at 2:26 PM #

        You do a good job of writing funny, stupid poetry. What a talented guy. You’re better at it than I am. 🙂

      • Christopher De Voss November 4, 2013 at 2:27 PM #

        I appreciate that. Thank you.

  10. ksbeth November 4, 2013 at 6:18 PM #

    love the first one, you are such a romantic

  11. The Bumble Files November 4, 2013 at 7:12 PM #

    These are quite good, Christopher! I especially like the paint by number. Blue is my favorite color!

  12. peachyteachy November 4, 2013 at 8:22 PM #

    Who was your muse for “Short Celebrities?”

  13. night owl November 4, 2013 at 11:49 PM #

    The Women Logic is not at all logical….

    Oh.

    I get it.

    😉

  14. David Stewart November 5, 2013 at 9:44 AM #

    Hilarious! You’re the man.

  15. lifeissarcasm November 5, 2013 at 12:39 PM #

    Hmmmm, SoundS To Me Like Someone Was Feeling A Bit Negative. Great For Us! My Fav Was The Paint By Numbers, Followed By The Six Pack. Quite Joyful. More Please.

  16. rayworth1973 November 5, 2013 at 9:03 PM #

    Quotable quotes!

  17. ohlidia November 5, 2013 at 11:30 PM #

    I feel a poetry book deal coming soon… 😉

  18. sothislife November 6, 2013 at 1:42 PM #

    Brilliant post…just loved it. It brightened my day.

  19. Krishnan P Nair November 7, 2013 at 11:11 AM #

    The poem moved me. I’m now on the edge. 😀

  20. Sean Smithson November 18, 2013 at 10:31 AM #

    Lovely. Though the first one is definitely my favourite. In fact, would you mind if I start using that? I’m tired of going to weddings on my own…

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