We are about to combine the two greatest words in the English language. These two words are so very polar in there uses, that I am a little afraid that once we do combine them, the entire Universe will collapse on itself.
But what makes these two words so special to begin with? Well, one of the words you can put in front of any other word in the English language (or any other language for that matter) and it becomes the ultimate insult. Likewise, the other word you can put behind any other word in the English language and it becomes the ultimate compliment.
These two words are the pinnacle Ying Yang of American vocabulary.
First up…the dark side:
The real meaning of this word is: The rinsing of any body cavity. However, couple this in front of any other word (or phrase for that matter) and you the ultimate insult.
For example:
Douchebag Douche Canoe Douchey Douche Pot Pie Douche Pounder With Cheese Douche Quake Doucheprechaun Douchepticon Douche Rocket Douchesaurus Rex Douche Sauce Doucheoroni Douchey Douche (<- combined with itself for the ultimate in insult power) The Douche Master Double Douche Pounder With CheeseOn the opposite side of the coin we have the total compliment word. Put this word behind any other word in the English language and Voilà! the ultimate in recognition and/or awesomeness.
And we all know a Ninja is a covert agent or mercenary of feudal Japan specializing in unorthodox arts of war.
Examples of Ninja salutations:
Birthday Ninja Ass Ninja Sex Ninja Dirt Bike Ninja Blonde Ninja Drink Ninja Dart Ninja Bed Ninja Apple Ninja Google Ninja Driving Ninja Frog Ninja Guitar Ninja Guitar Hero NinjaNow watch as we use the same everyday words to formulate either an insult or a compliment, just so you understand the power of these words.
Douche Pirate – Pirate Ninja Douche Monkey – Monkey Ninja Douchey Beer Dude – Beer Dude Ninja Douche Driver – Driving NinjaMuch like the English language, there are a few rare cases where the rules don’t always apply.
For example:
Lord of the Douche – Ninja of the Dance Night of a 1000 Douches – Night of a 1000 Ninjas Hey Douchebag! – Hey, Ninja! (The coma is the key.)Now for ultimate pairing, as if you didn’t already figure it out several hours ago. Word of warning: I am not responsible for any changes in the cosmic universe if you choose to say and/or use this word.
BOOM!
Now go call your neighbor a Douche Ninja.
I don’t even think I can pick a favorite in all of these new douche terms! funny post 🙂
I thought it was a douchy post. Thanks for reading.
what a ninja writer 🙂 haha
love it
xx
Thank you, I try not to be a douche ninja.
I’m sure you aren’t a douche ninja 🙂 to be a douche you have to wrongly use the word ninja.. SO from my powers of deduction i have established you are in fact most definitely not a douche 🙂 x
Thanks! 🙂