My Simplistic Review of HBO’s The Newsroom

I love HBO original programming.

The current schedule HBO is offering is incredible.

First you have Boardwalk Empire which originally I only tuned in to see Steve Buscemi, but ended up being hooked on the show. It is about prohibition in Atlantic City at the turn of the century. (The 1900s, not the 2000s!)

*Steve Buscemi in Boardwalk Empire

Then there’s Veep with Julia Louis-Dreyfus. It’s a bit talky for me, but as a teenager I had a crush on Julia when she was on Saturday Night Live. As with all Louis-Dreyfus stuff it’s awkward funny.

*Julia Louis-Dreyfus in Veep

Girls is another show. It’s really quirky. You have to stick with it a little while to get into it. It is only a half hour long, so I watched it while waiting for True Blood to come back on the air.

*Lena Dunham in Girls

And of course, Game of Thrones. If your not watching this show, you should be, but you have to start at the beginning…don’t be doing that watch one episode in the middle of season 3 thing and then declare it was the stupidest thing ever.

The only complaint I have on Game of Thrones is I can’t keep track of anyone’s names. The cast, as I have it, consists of: the midget, the queen, the little girl, her sister, the stupid boy king, the midget’s friend, the cripple, the dragon girl who used to get naked a lot but now doesn’t, the scar face man, the gay king…there’s more, but I think you see where I’m going with this…

*A monster from Game of Thrones

So now there is The Newsroom. It’s about a cable TV network’s newsroom.

The End.

No, just joking. It has Jeff Daniels in it, playing the same character he played in Dumb and Dumber.

Jeff Daniels in Dumb and Dumber

No, just joking again. He is playing an asshole news anchor who is more worried about his likability with the audience then his likability with anyone or anything else.

*Jeff Daniels in The Newsroom

The show was created by Aaron Sorkin, so you know there is going to be lots of dialogue and lots of people walking and talking in tight corridors. (A la West Wing and Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip)

There are some supporting characters as well: his ex-girlfriend now producer, another producer, a up and coming producer, a producer who left, an Indian guy, and a really hot chick that sits in the background a lot and only says one or two things in a single show.

It’s pretty good so far, but they do talk a lot of politics…and I’m just not into politics that much, so I’m not sure exactly what they are talking about. But I do like Jeff Daniel’s asshole character which fills a void that House M.D. left when it went of the air.

*Apparently in all HBO promo shots, the actors have to have the same far-off stare look.

Share This Pointy Picture

Saw this on Facebook:

Pointy arrow to the profile picture. Genius.

So I decided to make my own.  Feel free to use them.

Things Found Around The House

Here are a few things found around the house that caught my eye today:

I think this proves the Toddler is not a racist...or that she might be color blind.

This is my favorite brand of cheap poptarts because in the title it tells you how to cook them, then it tells you what to expect when they are done. No surprises here.

I'm afraid to try this coffee. I have never eaten caribou before, and I am not a big venison person anyway.

Hair product or porno advert?

The toddler's bedroom. Notice all the pink girly stuff...and the scary Halloween pumpkin! (Might explain why she sometimes gets scarred in the middle of night...that's what they teach you in good parenting 101.)

The Teenage Girl sometimes hides for days in her room...never to be seen. Now I know how she survives...secret stash of Nutella.

The boy's bathroom. Very scary. Never go here! However I do notice 4 or 5 deodorants, shaving cream, 2 combs, a manicure kit...yet they are never bathed, shaved, or have combed hair...and always smell bad. Hmmm...

The fire alarms and I like to fight...usually around 3 am in the morning. This one lost.

See picture below

This is my collection of real food based on fake foods. These are from the Simpson's and True Blood TV shows.

My Simplistic Review Of The TV Show: American Horror Story

 This show is produced by Ryan Murphy who also has produced Nip/Tuck (Oh, OK…cool show) and Glee (Uh….OK…Well at least Nip/Tuck was cool).

The show starts off with a mental challenged girl (see how nice and politically correct I was there!) standing outside a broken down house. Then two twin boys come with bats. She tells them they are going to die, so they go into the house and start beating it up with the bats.

Then they die.

The next thing you know….sort of…a wife comes home to find her husband making noises in the bedroom. She cuts him with a knife. Later in the show you find out he was having an affair.

Then the same husband and wife, and a dog, and a sulky teenage girl move into the house which is no longer beat up by bats, but is actually in really good condition.

You find out they got the house really cheap.

They meet the neighbors, which is the grown up mentally challenged girl and her Mom.

The mentally challenged girl tells them they are going to die and gets bit by their dog.

For the next 20 or so minutes the husband walks around nude for awhile and tries to have sex with his wife. You see a lot of his butt. She doesn’t want to be touched by him because of the affair. At some point they have a big fight and then they have sex. Then later in the day, a guy in a bondage rubber suit has sex with his wife and gets her pregnant while the husband is nude in the kitchen.

The husband is a psychologist and spends some of the show talking to a weird teenage boy who wants to kill everyone in his school. At some point the teenage boy becomes friends with the sulky teenage girl and they lure a bully from the school into the basement to scare her…only instead of scaring the bully, some half Lord of the Rings looking creature/half human pops out of the dark and takes a big gash out of the bully’s face. The sulky girl tells the weird teenage boy to leave and never come back.

Oh, and I forgot the weird teenage boy writes the word: taint, on the wall of the sulky girls bedroom.

Side note: Both teenagers like to cut themselves a lot.

Two other characters are introduced through the course of the show. One is a half burnt man who likes to hang out in the laundry and follow the husband. The burnt man chases the husband in a car, and chases him on foot. The burnt man catches up to the husband eventually even though he has a limp. They talk, and you find out the house told the burnt man to kill his family by…shocker…burning them…in that very same house.

The second character is a maid who appears young and hot to the husband and old and nasty to the wife. At one point in the show the husband catches the young hot version of the maid touching herself, this causes the husband to touch himself, then they eventually touch each other as the sulky teenage girl walks in on them. She runs upstairs as the husband yells after her, but apparently everyone forgot this happen because it was never mentioned in the show again.

This is one of those shows where your not suppose to ever know what is going on, much like Twin Peaks or Lost.

The entire time my wife and I watched she would say,

“What is going on? I don’t know what is going on…”

Then I would laugh like she is stupid or something, it’s very obvious what is going on, and say,

“I don’t know either.”

Final verdict #1: Two much naked man butt.

Final verdict #2: This show will probably be off the air after the second season.

Randoms Pt 3

Whenever the children make me repeat something I always add one more to whatever number I have actually repeated.

Such as: “This is the fourth time I have asked you to turn off the hallway light. ”

Child will stop and think for a moment:

“No, Dad. You only said it three times. ”

“Ah-Ha, busted. You were listening. Now go give the dog a bath. ”

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How come whenever you go over to a friend’s house, you can’t ever work their TV remote if it looks different from yours? Play is always the little sideways triangle, and Stop the square. Fast Forward and Reverse are double triangles right and left respectively…however when not on your own personal remote, might as well be located on the toaster.

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Wouldn’t it be cool if a toaster had a Fast Forward button? Or settings for how high you would like your toast to pop out?

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Why are Oranges called Oranges, but Apples are not called Reds? Or Bananas not called Yellows? Why are Pineapples not called Skin That Looks Like A Spiky Armadillo But Doesn’t Hurt When You Touch It?

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Ping Pong, the only game named after how it sounds to play it.