I’m not a sports guy.
I think I finally want to be, it seems fun.
I like the fact that you get to use the terms “we”, “our”, and “us” when referring to “your” team without actually being a paid member of the team.
That’s really cool.
“How did your team do this weekend?”
“We did great. You know we are really looking good this year. Our running/kicking/goalie/batter leads the league in runs/kicks/bleeding so far!”
“I know! We really wish we had him on our team!”
You don’t do that with anything else on the planet.
“Our Coke-a-Cola tastes so good! How’s your brand?”
“We are also refreshing! Go Pepsi!”
I want to be part of the comradery that happens every Sunday in American homes. I want to wear someone else’s name on my back with some random number underneath of it. Except I would probably pick the worst member of the team just to be difficult.
“Hey, De Voss…who’s that on your back? Sticklockski? Number 109? Whaaaaaaat?”
“Really?! You have never heard of Sticklockski? C’mon! Sticklockski! 420 career bench warms! 16 stubbed toes in a single season? And you call yourself a sports fan!”
I think really, really, really fat guys in NFL jerseys are hilarious:
Are you ready for some football?! Or chicken wings?!
I think women in NFL jerseys are hilarious too:
Ha ha ha…so….funny…Man, is it suddenly warm in here?
I’m just glad dressing like your favorite sumo wrestler isn’t big here:
FYI: He has a Big Mac tramp stamp over his ass.
Starting a new trend
Christopher De Voss 
Sicklock thingamajig – one of the greats in my opinion
Cricket player I believe….
I have been pretending to be good at Sports-things for the last 10 years of my life. I am an enormous liar, and people find out about it when I boast about “our team winning the best basket” in reference to a football game.
_Apparently_ that’s not a thing.
This post makes me happy. 10 points!
Yay! He shoots, he scores!
I have a jersey and I never wear it! I won it in a bet, but it was for a team I hardly like. I guess I can say at least I own one. You can have it you like! You’re very right about this “our” and “we” phenomenon. You don’t see it anywhere else!
So true. I don’t own a jersey at all! You’re one up on me. Maybe we can hold a contest for it.
Someone said (I think it was either Marcel Proust or the Marquis De Sade) that sports fans use WE when the team wins and THEY when they lose. However, I noticed myself saying “WE’RE losing” in reference to my beloved L.A. Clippers. As for all the other teams THEY can go Eff themselves.
Gotcha! Go Clippers! Would be a good name for a barber shop quartet as well.
I love my sports teams and am guilty of using we and they, while being well aware that my only role is fandom. Without fans, owners would have no incentive to pay players the big commas.
True. And in secret I do like hockey. Go Red Wings!
Nice sumo outfit you got there with that other guy – didn’t know they had sumo teams! Cool!
Thanks! It’s a little drafty in the back.
Might have thought the extra padding could insulate you better, but those flaps are like car wash thingies – don’t those slap you around a bit?
A bit. (but I secretly like it. Shhh.)
good call
I make those in my black and white striped shirt.
I like sports because I get to use a whistle.
Yes, but where do you blow it from?
About 8 inches from your ear?
Figures.
I fucking hate sports. My wife is into football and NASCAR. I say “touchdown Dallas” no matter who gets a touchdown. Drives her crazy. Since we live five miles from the track, we go to the NASCAR event every year when they are in town. I sit there with my ear plugs and take a nap. I’m just the driver to the track. I’d rather be home with the daughter watching the house, but NOOO, I have to drive the wife to the track!
Oh well… she puts up with my star parties with the telescope. I suppose each of us have our watching paint dry moments.
Opposites attract!
I’m pretty sure I saw that sumo wrestling dude at the stadium with his face and chest/stomach painted with his team colours.
Lucky you! Did you get an autograph?
No. I am not a fan.
Don’t forget – if you become a sports fan – you get to watch them on tv while consuming large quantities of beer and hot wings! That’s something, right?
True. Does Sangria go with hot wings?
hahaha! Sure!
Go sports!
Interesting — I would sooo have you as a sports guy!
Really?
I KNOW this is going to sound sexist but you just seem like such a guy’s guy — in the best way, of course.
Of course! 🙂
What exactly is that sumo wrestler doing? It looks like he is getting up from using the commode. Is that a sport? I guess it depends on what you ate…
Taco Bell
Yeah, that does it for me, too. There’s a reason the slogan is “Make a run for the boarder…”