I Want To Run Away With You

6 May
I want to run away with you
To somewhere warm and breezy too
The only thing I ask or two
Is No Polar Bears
 
We will travel by night by train
Through the dark and pouring rain
Excuse me if I should refrain
But Absoutly No Polar Bears
 
As long as you are there
With your skin so fair
Just not me in my underwear
Being Eaten By Polar Bears
 
—–
 
Alternate Ending:
 
In the morning when the sun arise
If I find to my surprise
A Polar Bear has Eaten Your Eyes
Then I will say: I told you so…
 
Alternate Alternate Ending:
 
Rose are red
Violets are blue
That big ol’ Polar Bear
Has his eyes on you
 
Alternate Alternate Inception/Poe Ending:
 
They sailed off into the distance
On a boat built for three
Him, his love, and a Polar Bear
Nevermore
 
Alternative Dr Suess Ending:
 
A Polar Bear Named Ned
Danced On The Head
Of A Ziggy Wed Bed
And Ate Bread 
With Your Head
 
Alternative Shel Silverstein Ending:
 
The Polar Bear rocked the lovers to sleep
After giving up his fur, his claws, and his feet
Deciding that was way too sweet
Buried the lovers deep
In concrete
 
Alternative Metallica Ending:
 
*screaming*
 
Exit Polar Bear
Enter Night
Eat my hand
Run Away To North Pole Land
 
*Insert guitar riff here*
 
 
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32 Responses to “I Want To Run Away With You”

  1. saravassilissa May 6, 2013 at 9:09 AM #

    Do you no Matt

  2. Cara Thereon May 6, 2013 at 9:27 AM #

    Cracked me up.

  3. silkpurseproductions May 6, 2013 at 9:52 AM #

    I am sensing a lack of affection for Polar Bears.

    This was fun.

    • Christopher De Voss May 6, 2013 at 10:27 AM #

      Thank you. No, I love giant creatures that could rip me from limb to limb for no other reason except sport.

  4. erickeys May 6, 2013 at 12:56 PM #

    I’m partial to the Shel Silverstein ending, myself.

    • Christopher De Voss May 6, 2013 at 3:14 PM #

      Silverstein fan?

      • erickeys May 6, 2013 at 4:45 PM #

        I suppose. I don’t remember Silverstein all that well. I remember enjoying the playfulness of those books. Mostly I just like the idea of the bear getting sick of all these masochistic self-sacrifices and dumping the loves in concrete.

      • Christopher De Voss May 6, 2013 at 7:29 PM #

        Polar Bears love concrete.

  5. pivoine68 May 6, 2013 at 1:46 PM #

    Ah man! I love polar bears! Cancel that reservation immediately!

    Bises,
    Dawn

    • Christopher De Voss May 6, 2013 at 3:17 PM #

      Too bad. But if you choose the man eating bear over me, well, there is nothing I can do about it.

  6. ksbeth May 6, 2013 at 2:48 PM #

    this is hilarious and classic!

  7. gswaterman May 6, 2013 at 5:26 PM #

    Great! There’s a movie in this somewhere

  8. Andrew May 6, 2013 at 7:22 PM #

    Okay good, because I definitely imagined this with guitar.

  9. David Stewart May 6, 2013 at 8:10 PM #

    I love the alternate endings. Now I got “Enter Polar Bear” or whatever that is stuck in my head. My students are going to learn a new song today…

  10. ohlidia May 6, 2013 at 8:58 PM #

    I LOVE it!! Can’t decide on Poe or Silverstein… My 10 year-old daughter loves poetry, particularly Silverstein. I will have to show her this!

  11. gingerfightback May 7, 2013 at 2:51 AM #

    First time I’ve read underpants and Polar Bears in a poem. Moving and profound. Thank you

  12. Monk Monkey May 7, 2013 at 5:11 AM #

    I used to no Matt. Nevermore. Polar bear got him.

  13. apieceofheavenonearth June 4, 2013 at 2:29 AM #

    Reblogged this on In Construction and commented:

  14. Marylin Warner June 5, 2013 at 11:32 PM #

    I read them all, and if I had to choose it would be the Poe-type ending. This is depending on the mood, of course.
    Very interesting.

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