Randoms Pt 5

17 Oct

I think a great sitcom would star Edward Scissorhands, Wolverine, and Freddy Krueger…and take place in either a Barber Shop, a Bakery, a Whore House, or a Marble Packing Plant.

Who invented smoking? Who walked around nature and decided to light various plants on fire and then stick them in their mouth to see if they would get any enjoyment from that?

Speaking of smoking, if we legalize weed, what would the pot heads have to talk about?

Who also decided it was a good idea to ground a coffee bean and pour hot water over it? I think Juan and Jorge were having a contest one day to see who could make the biggest smashed coffee bean hill, when Juan got mad that he was losing and poured water all over Jorge’s pile to sabotage his victory. Little did Juan know that Jorge was cheating by hiding a cup in his pile to make it look bigger, and now his cup was filled with brewed coffee. Then it just so happened that Juan’s two little sisters were on their way to Grandma’s, one bringing her non dairy half ‘n half, and the other bringing her a sugar substitute of your choice. The sisters just so happened to see a snake, and in their fear, threw the half ‘n half and sugar substitute in the air, which of course landed in Jorge’s cup of coffee. Then a bully from the village walked up on Jorge and Juan, saw the strange liquid and told them to drink it or he was going to kick their ass!. Well, the donkey actually belonged to Juan’s Grandpa, and Juan’s Grandpa would not be happy if it was kicked, so they drank it. They liked it, but pretended not too, so the bully was none the wiser to their new found fortune.

One day, sometime later after coffee became very popular, somewhere in Italy, a  bully made some guy named Tony, put way too much milk in his coffee, but he wasn’t satisfied with that…he then made Tony blow bubbles into his coffee. Little did the bully know, but he help Tony invent the cappuccino.

Look it up on Wikipedia, I will be adding that to it in a couple of days.

Men’s pants have a zipper in the front, has anyone ever invented women’s pants with a zipper in the middle?

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2 Responses to “Randoms Pt 5”

  1. Jenn November 1, 2011 at 11:16 PM #

    We would still have plenty to talk about, such as: what household items make great smoking apparatus, also how dark side of the moon totally syncs up with the wizard of oz…

    • chrisdevoss November 2, 2011 at 12:05 AM #

      …. And that the universe is a speck in someone’s fingernail…

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