My Simplistic Review Of The TV Show: American Horror Story

10 Oct

 This show is produced by Ryan Murphy who also has produced Nip/Tuck (Oh, OK…cool show) and Glee (Uh….OK…Well at least Nip/Tuck was cool).

The show starts off with a mental challenged girl (see how nice and politically correct I was there!) standing outside a broken down house. Then two twin boys come with bats. She tells them they are going to die, so they go into the house and start beating it up with the bats.

Then they die.

The next thing you know….sort of…a wife comes home to find her husband making noises in the bedroom. She cuts him with a knife. Later in the show you find out he was having an affair.

Then the same husband and wife, and a dog, and a sulky teenage girl move into the house which is no longer beat up by bats, but is actually in really good condition.

You find out they got the house really cheap.

They meet the neighbors, which is the grown up mentally challenged girl and her Mom.

The mentally challenged girl tells them they are going to die and gets bit by their dog.

For the next 20 or so minutes the husband walks around nude for awhile and tries to have sex with his wife. You see a lot of his butt. She doesn’t want to be touched by him because of the affair. At some point they have a big fight and then they have sex. Then later in the day, a guy in a bondage rubber suit has sex with his wife and gets her pregnant while the husband is nude in the kitchen.

The husband is a psychologist and spends some of the show talking to a weird teenage boy who wants to kill everyone in his school. At some point the teenage boy becomes friends with the sulky teenage girl and they lure a bully from the school into the basement to scare her…only instead of scaring the bully, some half Lord of the Rings looking creature/half human pops out of the dark and takes a big gash out of the bully’s face. The sulky girl tells the weird teenage boy to leave and never come back.

Oh, and I forgot the weird teenage boy writes the word: taint, on the wall of the sulky girls bedroom.

Side note: Both teenagers like to cut themselves a lot.

Two other characters are introduced through the course of the show. One is a half burnt man who likes to hang out in the laundry and follow the husband. The burnt man chases the husband in a car, and chases him on foot. The burnt man catches up to the husband eventually even though he has a limp. They talk, and you find out the house told the burnt man to kill his family by…shocker…burning them…in that very same house.

The second character is a maid who appears young and hot to the husband and old and nasty to the wife. At one point in the show the husband catches the young hot version of the maid touching herself, this causes the husband to touch himself, then they eventually touch each other as the sulky teenage girl walks in on them. She runs upstairs as the husband yells after her, but apparently everyone forgot this happen because it was never mentioned in the show again.

This is one of those shows where your not suppose to ever know what is going on, much like Twin Peaks or Lost.

The entire time my wife and I watched she would say,

“What is going on? I don’t know what is going on…”

Then I would laugh like she is stupid or something, it’s very obvious what is going on, and say,

“I don’t know either.”

Final verdict #1: Two much naked man butt.

Final verdict #2: This show will probably be off the air after the second season.

4 Responses to “My Simplistic Review Of The TV Show: American Horror Story”

  1. graysonjack October 11, 2011 at 1:56 PM #

    I was really expecting so much more from that show. Eh, oh well. Perfect review though.

    • chrisdevoss October 11, 2011 at 9:34 PM #

      I’m giving it one more episode before it gets deleted from the DVR queue.

  2. BrainRants October 12, 2011 at 9:27 AM #

    Well I appreciate you saving me an hour of my life I otherwise would not get back easily.

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