St Augustine Coupons

12 Aug

Two quick facts:

1) I love St Augustine. It’s a great coastal town that does not look like every other coastal town in Florida. The people are extremely nice. The prices of the attractions are reasonable and there is a lot to do.

2) I live in a tourist town myself, Orlando Florida.

OK, that being said, whenever I  go on a vacation, either mini or maxi, I always grab a coupon book, and poke some fun at it. It’s a great time killer during lull periods and making fun of things is kind of my hobby.

This first ad is for a $1.00 off the Ximenez-Fatio House. You can tour an elegant 1830’s boarding house.

I can’t imagine this a very exciting tour:
OK folks on your right of the hallway we have a boarding room, and if you look to the left you will see another boarding room. Further down we have some boarding rooms…Don’t forget for a couple of bucks more you will be able to see the second floor boarding rooms… “

Beerhammer’s the Beer Gear Store will give you a free beer book with a $20 purchase. The perfect gift for your alcoholic friends.

I know you like beer, so I got you this book on beer. You can’t drink it, but if you run out of beer, you can lick the pages and pretend you have beer.

Here is a great picture of a super scared kid blowing a party favor for Adventure Landing.

“Blow that party favor kid, or we kill your dog!”

We went to Adventure Landing, which is a sort of local Chuck-E-Cheese’s with the video games that spit out tickets so you can trade them in for prizes. I wanted to win this giant Spider-Man sitting on a ball.

But I was told that’s two separate prizes. I think it cost somewhere in the ball park of 50 million tickets. Needless to say I was a little disappointed.

Next up: Ride the big smiley face of death at Smile High Parasail.

Company motto: Die with a smile on your face!

These are the best companies – charge people for what they can do for free.

So I can either walk to all these bars for free, or I can pay you to walk with me,and tell me a little weird story about them…hmmm…decisions, decisions. No offense, but I can probably make-up a better story for myself.

Free pocket knife with coupon at the Knife Factory.

(Read in a redneck voice.) “Son, I am so proud this day has come. Your first free pocket knife…” (tears…small choking sound) “I am so proud of my 4-year-old right now!” (wipes face with union jack hanky)

I thought this was a wax museum dedicated to Harry Potter, but I don’t remember Michael Jordan or Elvis in any of the Harry Potter movies, so I think this might be a scam. (It’s not a scam, I am wrong…with apologies to the Potter Wax Museum. Apparently this is the same wax museum that the figures come to life when no one is looking and kills people. What? I am wrong again?)

Finally a little something for Mommy:

I was wondering why she sent us to see the Castillo de San Marcos fort by ourselves. Something about Mommy time?

Seriously, I do recommend St Augustine, Florida for a nice get away. And grab a coupon book, not only will it provide minutes of entertainment…you might save a buck or two.

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